I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
