Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
another moral hangover. fuck.
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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