After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
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