i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
