You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
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