Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I pour the whiskey from now on
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
