Just cropdusted the office
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Randomize
