Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
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