I want to stick my p in your. b.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize