I am in a vortex of obligation.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Randomize
