i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Randomize
