aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Randomize
