Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
