would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
I think I just got drunk texted by my psychiatrist
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize