And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
Randomize
