we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
