Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
