did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
