That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
