apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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