i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
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