We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
