She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
He may or may not be blacked out. We put him to sleep in the community bathroom. He's wrapped in your blanket and he's already puked on it twice. Using your blanket was my idea. Maybe next time you'll ask before taking my vodka.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
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