I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
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