break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I tried to high-five the cop last night. he just looked at my raised hand and told me to go to bed.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
