you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
Randomize
