wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Randomize
