last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
