we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I just dropped a chicken nugget on the floor and seriously prayed that it would be ok....I think this job is making me crazy.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Randomize
