Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
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