Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
He made me spaghetti, gave me wine and I fucked him on the floor, Is that a fair trade of services to you?
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