clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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