your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I can't break up with him, I ran the math. Taking into account his 7 inch penis and the standard deviation from average, almost 90% of guys should have a smaller penis than he does.
Really? Penis math? This is why guys shouldn't date female engineers.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
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