some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Randomize
