Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
