Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
now i know why i became what i already was.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
this hospital has no fireball
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize