So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
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