so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
i dont even know how to be here
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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