No, drunk sperm still make babies.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
How do you confess that you've had phone sex with your fiancé's brother's ex-girlfriend's new guy she's dating who has also slept with your best friend?
Randomize