are you still at the devil's house?
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
I have teeth marks. Like distinct upper and lower jaw.
Yeah me too. My shoulder looks rabid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize