What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
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