4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
I skipped work to stalk him.
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
