i think i have herpe
just one?
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
i'm glad we've gotten to the point in our relationship where I can eat peach rings off your penis.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
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