he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Whatever you have to do, STALL THEM. Your toothbrush is in the kitchen, my pants are on the balcony, and I don't have eyebrows.
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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