I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
Randomize
