absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
