Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize