btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
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Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
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