Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.