quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
My Adderall prescription says to take my recommended dose and throw away any leftover pills. Why don't more prescriptions come with jokes like this?
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
do nipples grow back?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
